Well, the Mayans were wrong. We’re still here. Not just those of us on the website but you as well. Congratulations, we’ve made it.
It’s the time of year when doomed gym memberships begin, people give up drinking until roughly the first weekend of January, and the cycle of national self-destruction begins all over again before the NFL playoffs wrap up.
With that low expectation in mind, I have a list of a few ways to make 2013 better than 2012, and not in the hyped-up Facebook status delusional way, but real, practical stuff. If guidance from some shlub who does a weekly internet show is the kind you’re looking for, have I got a year for you!
In no particular order:
1. Stop taking an interest in celebrity pregnancies. You know who I mean and you know you shouldn’t care, so let’s nip this in the bud right away, shall we?
2. Smile at people. It’s free and it’s easy. Yeah, we’re all up inside our heads thinking about whether or not our last move in Words With Friends will cost us the game while the cashier greets us, but take a moment to smile and greet someone. It might make somebody other than you feel good, and that’s okay.
3. Don’t piss on public toilet seats. This goes for you too, ladies.
4. Go outside. A few thousand HD channels and an iPhone make it pretty easy for us to forge a deeper indentation in our couch cushions but we occasionally need to be reminded that there is a big world out there. And don’t just wait for summer weather to try this one.
5. Donate to stuff. Your time or your money. People, animals, finding cures for diseases – there are so many ways to make this world a better place. Buy one less $4 coffee each week and that’s $200 a year which can be used to do some good. Multiply that money by the number of people who are willing to do so and, well, you get the picture. Let’s actually try making the world around us better this year.
There you go, short and sweet. By the way, in case you have been too busy being festive to notice what’s been going on here at the dot-com, make sure to check out this year’s holiday video. It’s great because I’m in it.
Also, I made my triumphant return to the show last Friday, so if you missed me, go get your fix here.
Finally, for the sake of more self-promotion, check out some cover songs I recorded for fun last month over here.
Happy New Year to all people everywhere and remember to listen to this Friday’s show where we’ll look back at the peaks and pitfalls of 2012!